FRIENDSHIPS AND KAY !^!

Finding the right friends and keeping them can be so difficult. Everyone is unique and so different. sometimes we're really lucky enough to find those ones who we have a little bit in common with. i have lost many friends and I've gained double of that same amount. even the silliest of things can ruin friendships. things as stupid as over-used perfumes! i guess that's what distinguishes great friendships from people passing through. the first friend i ever lost was called Tamia! she's the skinniest person i've ever know and funny enough, she looks just like me and acts a lot lie me an I'm sure thats why we didn't get along. i think it mostly my fault as i have a way of being a bit too controlling sometimes. after her i tried to change that part of me but i failed because that was part of the reason the rest of my friendships went to the dust. OK, I'm not the nicest person alive but i do try. i give alms and i help people when i can but when things don't go my way i turn into this horrible monster suffering from PMS! but i credit myself on trying to work things out ( even though it never worked cos i managed to get controlling again while trying to sort our problems, Damn!) . anyways, i lost another great friend once ( not so great, really). i think that has got to be the meanest I've ever been. OK, I'll let you be the judge of that. i met this girls online and we hooked up. surprisingly I'd met one on a flight before ( the one i hurt, her name's Lele). well, they took me in and from the first day i could see that Lele was the "queen bee". it didn't really sit well with me as i was used to being the queen bee and i hated the way the other girls acted towards her( yeah, i know, elementary school). it seemed like they had no independent thoughts of their own and all the wanted to do was please her. somehow they realized i was interesting and they all wanted to be real close to me, even Lele. so i and lele started hanging out a lot and that kinda made the other girls feel left out. so Lele had to go home for the holiday ( we are in a university far from home) and she kinda left her stuffs with me (clothes and all). well, one of the other girls had this tendency to prefer other people's stuffs to hers, so liked to borrow Lele's clothes and accessories and then take pictures with them. by the time lele got back to town she did'nt like it atall as most of her clothes were on facebook and i was the new "queen bee". anyhow, they had this big quarrel and i was stuck in the middle. ended up being the one who got labeled the devil ( talk about the movie "mean girl's", there couldn't be two queens to one throne). playing the " they said, you said" game. everyone ended up getting hurt! i tried a million times to talk to Lele, but she didn't want anything to do with me. i tried everything, emails, phone calls...everything. I'm just glad i tried. i sleep well knowing that. even if we were all to blame. Now I'm stuck in this friendship with this stuck up girl that has been dragging for so long. so I'm still deciding if its worth saving ( got a great amount of advice from that site) . I'll let you guys know how it goes. LESSON : Life is like a tree. Friends are either roots or leaves or branches. the leaves are those people just passing through. with the slightest wind, they're out of your life but you'll survive. some are branches.....it'll talk a whole lot more for those to go and yes, they'll be missed but you'll survive. finally, the roots! those are the friends you don't want to loose. it'll take the world to chase them away and even after that, they'll stay. but if you think for a moment you're loosing any of those.. don't hesitate to do everything humanly possible to make them stay.