Day Break!

Hi there, guess who's back!!!!!!!! me!!!!

OK, so I've been away for a while. didn't feel like talking (writing). Been going through what i would call the holy grail of bad days. I'm still there but I've decided i wont allow those things to keep me away from you guys ( yeah i know, i love me too). you're probably wondering what happened, lets just say somebody took something that wasn't theirs to take. people are wondering why I'm still so composed and seemingly unmoved, I'm not sure why. I'm probably still in shock. maybe one day I'll really understand what happened and then I'll probably have a nervous breakdown but until then, I'll be right here with you.

My one cent to anyone who's been burned down is to get up and keep moving. it will be difficult but you cant afford to let the offender win. take control!

OK, I've been to the gym everyday since the last time we talked except for Saturday, Sunday and Monday ( ok, so i've been to the gym only thrice since we talked, bite me!). i can swear that my stamina has increased 100%. i can now go on the machines for above 45minutes compared to the first day when i thought i was going to die after the first 5minutes. Been doing the strength training and now i'm a familiar face at the gym. It makes me feel really good. As for the food business, i think I'm slacking off a bit. Its so hard to monitor your food especially when you have to be in school all day. continuously been tempted by the disgustingly unhealthy foods there. i'll try harder to get back on track with the food thing.


Relationship/boyfriend update: we sorted everything out. He's been the best thing to ever happen to me and he just sent me a message to update you guys. he's really sensitive! so he wants me to tell you guys that he's still here and even more in love with me ( awwwwww, you see why i love him?)! He's one of those few people left in the world that makes me think that there's still some good left in this dark. creepy place.

i'll be back with more info later. gotta go to the gym. i'm even impressing myself ( yeah, yeah, roll your eyes all you want!).

Not Today, Not Now!

Hi guys, just got back from the gym (4th Feb) . had a great workout. my muscles are sore and I'm still clueless on what to eat to make all my hard work worthwhile. i think I've lost a bit of weight because, i measured my waist today (just before i ate an entire bowl of witabix) and it was 29cm, so that's 1cm shy from the original size. Right now, with my tummy full of witabix, its currently at 30cm. I'm hoping its just d bloated tummy talking.

So its the 5th today and i feel ill. I'm still bloated and too sore to even move. No exercise for me today. Everything hurts! even my ass bones/muscles. I had a little bit of rice earlier on for lunch and i suspect its to blame for my tummy issues. I'll just wait till tomorrow and see how this goes. moving on from all weight loss related matters.


Today hasn't been the best day. feeling a bit under the weather. Cant go to sleep and just had a fight with one of the most important people in my life ( the boyfriend). so i guess, its pretty safe to say, there's a big chance that this relationship is over! i suck at being mushy so this is pretty hard for me to write. this is one example of those relationships where love is not enough.

i appear to too many people as this kick-ass chick, who doesn't really care or need anyone but herself and its been a major problem in this relationship because, it gives people certain ideas that i don't love them as much as they love me. Which is so untrue and it hurts like hell. many times, I've tried my hardest to show them the best way i can and other times I've even gone beyond my best. Right now, to this person, its my fault that this relationship is probably over. i guess I'm just a hard person to love. oh well, bad things happen to bad people sometimes (like my friend used to say)!

You know what makes this horrible. it feels like deja vu. Been here before. funny enough, the last time i was here was just around this time of the year. Days to valentine! I hate valentine's day.
i guess some of us will just have to learn to live with misfortunes like this.

OK! so, today's post doesn't have the usual cheerful note like days before. hopefully tomorrow will be different. stay tuned.